Down Wit Da AIDSizzledizzle

Pop culture sland always has a shelf life. Nobody calls anything "groovy" anymore, you'd be hard pressed to find anyone scoring a touchdown saying "slap me five," and no self-respecting racist would ever call a black person a "darkie." Unfortunately, corporate types LOVE to integrate cultural slang into their product names and advertising campaigns ("this'll be really hip and fab for the kids!"), and sometimes they wind up stuck trying to sell a laughable anachronism. The comprehensive sex-ed program "Get Real about AIDS" seems well on its way down this path ... the program was named in 1992, at a time when we had yet to quiero Taco Bell, no dudes were getting Dells, and many people believed that Flavor Flav might actually have contributed something of substance to Public Enemy. Fifteen years later, the phrase "Get Real" has somehow remained somewhat inter-generationally relevant, but it's hanging by the thinnest of threads.

Perhaps it's time to rename "Get Real about AIDS" now that it has been thrust into the public sphere. As our pals at OneNewsNow.com report:

Pastor says superintendent doesn't want sex-ed curriculum revealed
A Florida pastor says a public school superintendent in St. Lucie County has purposely kept parents from finding out about the sexually graphic nature of sex-education curriculum for the district. The school board in St. Lucie County, Florida will hold a public forum Saturday, December 8, on the proposed sex-ed curriculum called "Get Real About AIDS." But Pastor Brian Longworth, associate pastor of Covenant Tabernacle World Outreach Center in Port St. Lucie, says the public forum is not being advertised or promoted. He believes superintendent Michael Lannon is hiding the curriculum's content from parents because of its sexually graphic nature, which Lannon maintains is meant to promote abstinence.

First of all, do yourself a favor and re-read that paragraph. First of all, there is a PUBLIC FORUM scheduled to discuss this curriculum ... that forum will be held in THREE WEEKS ... and Brian Longworth "believes" that the Superintendent is "hiding" the content of the curriculum on the basis of lack of advertising. Never mind the complete last sentence of the paragraph:

He believes superintendent Michael Lannon is hiding the curriculum's content from parents because of its sexually graphic nature, which Lannon maintains is meant to promote abstinence.

Apparently, Longworth is saying that Superintendent Lannon says that sexually graphic material promotes abstinence. I'm guessing that Mr. Longworth's comprehension problems extend to the world of vocabulary, and he may not understand the meanings of the words "libel" and "slander." But I digress. Of course, the article takes the typical "inflame and obfuscate" road and then makes a right turn on Propaganda Highway:

Pastor Longworth wonders if the curriculum is so good, why it is being kept from parents. He says if the school district thinks that highly of the curriculum, district officials should be proud and stand up and say it is a condom-based curriculum. "He's being deceptive, trying to trick parents into thinking that this is something that they will like, and not releasing the curriculum in time for them to review it."

Just in case "Pastor" Longworth wants area parents to check out the curriculum, I have a few web resources for him:

http://www.etr.org/recapp/programs/getreal.htm
http://www.advocatesforyouth.org/programsthatwork/7getreal.htm
http://www.cdc.gov/hiv/resources/reports/hiv_compendium/section1-22.htm

Also, Google returns a few billion results for "Get Real About AIDS," but in case Longworth's backwater Florida no-teeth half-retarded parishoners are too poor to afford the Internets because they've been fucking since they were 12 and have dozens of illegitimate children strewn across the deep south who all suffer from various deformations due to high incidences of chlamydia, syphillis, gonorrhea, hepatitis, HPV, and fetal alcohol syndrome ... well, here's a sampling of what they would find:

Overview of the Curriculum
The Get Real about AIDS high school version is a 14-lesson curriculum uses entertaining activities, discussions, roleplays, simulations and videos to give teens the knowledge and skills needed to reduce their risk of HIV infection. Although Get Real about AIDS is an HIV prevention curriculum, it addresses sexual risk-taking behaviors related to pregnancy prevention, including: delaying sexual activity, using condoms, being monogamous if sexually active, and avoiding risky situations.

Curriculum Objectives
At the completion of this program, youth will:

Reduce their risk of becoming infected with HIV.
Delay sexual activity.
If sexually active, use good judgement by abstaining from drug use, using condoms correctly, getting tested for HIV, and being monogamous.
Not share needles.

Get Real about AIDS consists of the following 14 lessons:
Lesson 1: Teenage Vulnerability to HIV
Lesson 2: Transmission of HIV
Lesson 3: All about AIDS and Other STDs
Lesson 4: Delaying Sex
Lesson 5: Preventing HIV Infection
Lesson 6: Limits
Lesson 7: The Refusal Skill, Day 1
Lesson 8: The Refusal Skill, Day 2
Lesson 9: Peer Messages
Lesson 10: Using the Refusal Skill Proactively
Lesson 11: Becoming Comfortable Using The Refusal Skill
Lesson 12: The Refusal Skill for Self-Control
Lesson 13: The Community Meeting
Lesson 14: Transfer

Never mind that on August 29, more than a few peeople already had their public fill of this issue:

At Tuesday's four-hour School Board workshop, the board did not vote on any changes to the current curriculum but listened to 35 people speak for and against the changes.
LINK

In fact, the audience of more than 150 people at the Dolly Hand Center on the campus of Palm Beach Community College came from throughout the Glades, with smatterings of folks from the east coast of Palm Beach County and included some Martin and St. Lucie County, as well. Hastings and a panel of area agency leaders provided current information that addressed the healthcare needs of people infected with HIV/AIDS and the latest educational programs aimed at preventing the disease.
LINK

Apparently, rather than distribute this information to his "parishoners," Longworth has been very busy writing his own material:

Through his church's website, the group Youth for America -- of which the pastor is a co-founder -- has gathered more than 3,750 petitions in opposition to the sex-ed curriculum.

WHOA! Once again, OneNewsNow has located a movement with an ASTONISHING raw number of petitions. Now, imagine that 100 people signed each of these 3,750 petitions ... that's like 8.9 BILLION signatures, right? Fucking impressive. Anyway, most of these people apparently signed these petitions after they viewed this information about the hidden curriculum posted on "Pastor Longworth's church website. I guess that Longworth's claims about a campaign of secrecy are grounded in the fact that nobody visits his Church's shitty-assed, designed-for-the-Lynx-browser-in-1993 website. Hey Bryan - fantastic unreadable animated GIF of a watchtower beacon in the top left banner. Perhaps you can work in a reference to "Where's The Beef?" so that everyone feels like they really did need a time machine to view your ghastly site (notice how I worked that "Pop Culture shelf life" theme back in? I'm good).

Anyway, what would a ONN article be without, as Fantod points out, a display of ONNanism from the dedicated readers:

Do you ever wonder why schools today cannot teach children how to read,write and general math skills but believe adamantly they can teach them about sex? Stupid is as stupid does. In this case it is the people who vote for the DEMONcrats that do not have a clue. It is simple, the devil wants our children. When will this nation turn from our wicked ways and humble ourselves and seek GOD'S face and pray for our nation and our families. This Thanksgiving can be for real. The GOD of ABRAHAM, ISACC and JACOB is waiting for you to ask JESUS into your heart. Don't wait. Please

In CHRIST,

Danny B. Joyner
Brewton, Alabama
JOHN 3:16

Yes Danny ... the Devil wants your kids. And he wants to fuck 'em in the ass. And cum all over them. Oh, actually, that's what your neighbor in the shack that he hasn't fixed up since Hurricane Noinsurance wants to do with your kids. My bad.

somehow i feel this person who wants to keep sex education content secret should be investigated for child sex violations. i think you will find that he is more than a educator to children.

Posted by paul ruppert

My my ... you know, I wouldn't mind the unfounded accusations of molestation so much if they weren't peppered with grammatical errors. This is an EDUCATOR we're talking about - let's try to be a bit more formal.

Ever hear or read the story of Sodom and Gomorrah? Those men in that city were so perverted they even tried to molest the Holy Angels of God. After being struck blind by those Angels, they FELT for the door to Lot's home. That is absolute perversion and enslavement of the spirit and mind. Soon HE comes back to take us out of this corrupted sewer/slime pit. A normal human (at least one) would have immediately gotten to a physician to see about his eyesight. Not this group of Sodomites. Their mind, as today, was below the belt.

Posted by Golf Pro

Goodness - always with the Sodom and Gomorrah references. Don't these people think of anything else? Do they whack off to that Bible story constantly (or is it just me who does that)?